Random WTF Lyrics #47

Welcome to Random WTF Lyrics where we look at six random lyrics from six random songs. Let’s get started.

Lapdance-N.E.R.D ft Vita & Lee Harvey

So I recently got into listening to N.E.R.D, a pet project of the Neptunes themselves, Pharrell and Chad Hugo, that leans more into rock music. More specifically, I’m listening to their first album In Search Of… and there’s some interesting shit here. I’m actually considering an album review to give my full thoughts on it. Anyways, Lapdance.

I'm an outlaw (I'm an outlaw)
Quick on the draw (Quick on the draw)
Somethin' you've never seen before (Never Seen)
And I dare a mother fucker to come in my face

Wait, hold on. What was that last line?

And I dare a mother fucker to come in my face

I’m sorry. I know that’s immature of me and I get that Pharrell is basically saying, “you got something to say, say it to my face.” But he could’ve used a better phrase than “come in my face” because that brings up imagery of, well…

… seamen.

While we’re on that topic, …

The Flintstones Theme Song

We'll have a gay old time

I swear to every god in every religion that this isn’t a theme. Yes, this is a theme song to a cartoon from the 60s and back then, gay had a different meaning. Still, it doesn’t make it not sound like Fred rubbing his Flintstone with Barney’s Rubble. Maybe that explains all of those Fruity Pebbles commercials, it’s all sexual tension with the cereal representing the LGBT+ rainbow. A gay old time, indeed. 

Can’t Believe It-T-Pain ft Lil Wayne

Put you in the mansion, somewhere in Wiscansin

Misspelling Wisconsin just to force a rhyme. Wow. Yeah, I know T-Pain’s from the South and people from the South pronounce things differently, but it still doesn’t make it less silly.

Let’s Get Down-Bow Wow ft Birdman

Hey! now I'm about to test ya' p's lil bow wow.
(uh-huh) See lil' one ova' there.
She bout 25, and she been looking at cha'.
Pull ova' there in ya ride on 22's and bust her out!

I know this girl named Keisha
She's no groupie
Be far from the stars
22's made her choose me.
Like
Telling all her friends in the Benz
"He don't really look 16 do he?"

Statutory rape, ladies and gentlemen. And of course, it’s encouraged by Birdman. Every day, it makes much more sense that Lil Wayne left Cash Money Records if Birdman is doing stuff like this.

Do Me-Bell Biv DeVoe

Backstage, underage, adolescent
How ya doin', fine, she replied
I sighed, I like to do the wild thing
Action took place
Kinda wet, don't forget
The J, the I, the M, the M, the Y, why'all
I need a body bag

What’s Happnin’-Ying Yang Twins ft Trick Daddy

Ah, yes. More of that crunk music I grew up hearing. Granted, this particular song hasn’t held up that well, but goddamn, that chorus goes hard.

BOOM!! it's on, bitch nigga we'll rock yo' room
BOOM!! bitch what's happnin'? (WHAT?!)
BOOM!! bitch what's happnin'? (WHAT?!)
BOOM!! it's on, bitch nigga we'll rock yo' room
BOOM!! bitch what's happnin'? (WHAT?!)
BOOM!! bitch what's happnin'? (WHAT?!)

But that’s not what this song is here for. No, it’s this.

Because I love my gun, I play wit' my gun
Have fun wit' my gun, have sex wit' my gun

You know? There’s being a passionate gun owner and then there’s this. Even the NRA aren’t this passionate about their gun fetish. How do you have sex with a gun? Do you stick your dick into where the trigger is or do you stick the barrel into your anus? I hope it isn’t the latter, especially if it’s loaded, because one slip-up and you’ll be shitting blood and bullets. 

And that was Random WTF Lyrics. No lyrics are safe.

Peace!!